Be The Glue That Keeps Your Family Together

For families that are strong and who work well together, there is usually one family member who is the glue or the hub of the family unit. How can you be the person that keeps your family strong and together?

- Show that you love and respect your family.
- Be there for your family and be willing to help when required.
- Help your family find creative solutions to problems.
- Do not be controlling or overly involved in relationships with family members.
- Show strength by role modeling.
- Encourage family unity and be the leader in doing this.
- Be flexible and calm.

My daughter has always called me the 'hub' of the family. I do always seem to know what is going on within the family and where everyone is. Anytime somebody wants to know something, they call me. Even when I'm on vacation, they instinctively feel I will know what is happening with the family. This is the situation with my brothers as well as my children.

I believe that communication is part of the glue. Because I am open with my own thoughts and feelings, as a result they undoubtedly feel comfortable doing the same with me. It is necessary to be non-judgmental when others tell you how they feel. Giving an opinion unless asked can sometimes cause problems; sometimes people just want to unload. I know from my own experience that often just talking about a situation crystallizes the problem and makes me feel better because someone has listened.

Listening is helpful when it comes to keeping families together and making them stronger. Everyone wants to talk to someone who they know is listening to them and understands how they feel. It is particularly disconcerting when someone constantly switches the conversation around to themselves and their own interests.

Showing an interest in what others are doing is important. If you are interested, people will know. Being interested doesn't mean infringing on others' personal business however. Asking questions that are too personal will make a person clam up. People will talk about the heart of their problems when they are ready to do so.

Set aside time for someone if they wish to talk to you. There is always time for family and especially for a family member who has something that is bothering him/her. Also show genuine concern when someone is upset. Often all a person needs is a sympathetic ear.

You will find that you are the glue if you are the person family members want to call when they are happy and proud about something wonderful that has happened to them. If you are the glue they will also call you when they're upset. You will be the one the rest of the family knows will hold the family together in times of crisis. You will be the hub that the family revolves around.