Writing a Eulogy for Your Loved One

Speaking about a loved one at a funeral or a Celebration of Life is one of the most difficult things many of us will face. Our emotions are already shredded with the loss of someone close to us to the point where we can hardly think. How can we write a Eulogy too?

I recently wrote a eulogy when my mother died although I initially had no idea where to begin. The best thing to do is speak from your heart. Eulogies are about the memories of that person and your shared personal experiences. It is an opportunity to reminisce and say why this special person was well-loved and will be missed by you and others.

A eulogy can be serious but including some humorous anecdotes will lighten an otherwise solemn occasion. It is okay if those gathered smile, or if they cry and it's natural if you do too. No one will hold it against you.

The following are some ideas to help you write a eulogy for your loved one:

- develop a theme, perhaps talk about one aspect of your loved one's life, i.e.: the good times you shared;
- mention a particular situation;
- mention something that he or she was passionate about;
- try to make it inspiring, praise him/her;
- include quotes and memories from his/her closest friends and relatives;
- mention memorable events and share a story;
- say why you will miss him/her and what you will never forget;
- suitable quotations, poems or bible readings can be included;
- mention how he/she affected others;
- talk about his/her interests and achievements;
- write your eulogy in chronological order.

Paint a picture of words of your loved one so that those present will feel his or her presence. At the reception following the service a friend of mine said she could almost feel my mother's presence. I told her she probably was there and reminded her that even at ninety my mother hated to miss a party.

At the end of your eulogy try to end it with something thoughtful and heartfelt. I ended my eulogy with, 'Thank you to all of you who had been her friend. She was my mother but she had also been my friend and I will miss her too.' A friend added at the end of her eulogy, 'An old Indian legend says that 'no one ever dies as long as one person is left to speak his/her name.' You will continue to live through your family and friends.'

And a quote from Dr. Seuss, 'Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.'