The Joys and the Stress of Parenting

Do you parent as your parents did? Or have you found your own way of parenting? To parent well is one of the most important things we have to do in life. Unfortunately, it is a task that too many people put too little thought into, thinking that being a good parent will happen naturally.

Some people do not care for the way they were parented so will choose to parent to the other extreme, i.e.: they may have had what they believed were overly strict parents so they will choose to be overly permissive. Some will choose to get their parenting advice from friends who themselves are trying to learn how to parent, others will read books or search the internet, take parenting classes or perhaps they will ask someone who has successfully raised their children for ideas on how best to parent.

What could be considered successfully raising a child to adulthood? What do we hope our child will grow up being? Most of us would answer that we would like them to be happy, responsible, productive, good members of society and ones we can be proud to call our children.

How do we do this? We must ensure that we parent positively by being nurturing and caring, loving unconditionally, by giving guidance and to discipline with love and respect.

Our children, in order for them to have confidence and self-esteem, must know that they have our support and that we are there for them. For us to be able to do this we have to take time for ourselves. And although parenting can be joyful and rewarding, it can also be stressful when combined with work and other outside tensions. It is important to learn how to cope with this stress. We can do this by learning to be calm, exercising to unwind and doing things for ourselves, i.e.: reading a good book, watching a funny movie, having a chat with a good friend or enjoying a special hobby.

It is important to remember also that each child is unique and what works for one may not work for the next one. When I was raising my five children, the two things I found that helped me through stressful times were patience and having a sense of humor. And the best tool of all is distraction. When a child is upset about something, get them interested in something else.

Parenting can be difficult at times, but it's certainly worth the effort.