Five Things to Do to Help Make Next Year Your Best Year Ever

There are things each of us can do, no matter what our situation is, to improve our lives. In most cases sitting and waiting for wonderful things to happen to us will not be the way to do it. The following are some of the things we can do:

1.Start by having a positive attitude. A positive attitude helps us to be more optimistic and to be better able to avoid negativity in our lives. It makes us happier, able to see the bright side of things and therefore the opportunities that are available to us. By having a positive attitude, our expectations are increased and if we expect good things to happen, they are more likely to than if we expect the worst. If we have a positive attitude we believe in ourselves and our abilities. And by being positive, people will react more favorably to us.

2.Set realistic goals and work towards them. Anything is possible. Realistic goals are ones you know you can realistically handle, i.e.: you probably wouldn't have time to go to the gym for an hour five days a week if you have several young children, a full-time job and a sick mother you are required to help look after. It might be more realistic to go twice a week for half an hour. Or, if you decide you want to lose twenty pounds in a week, that isn't realistic or healthy. It would be more realistic, and easier, to lose ten pounds in a month. Realistic goals keep a person focused and motivated but the goal has to work for you; and it must be one that you seriously want to attain.

3.Make life happen; don't let it just happen to you. If we sit around and wait for good things to happen to us, they won't. i.e.: if we want a better social life, we can organize fun things to do ourselves rather than wait for someone else to do it for us; we can take the initiative and be the leader. This can be done in any area of our lives whether it is with friends, family or in the workplace.

4.Get a handle on your financial situation so you control it and it doesn't control you. Begin with a budget, making sure you pay the necessary things like rent, food, heat and electricity before you spend money on things that are not absolute requirements. Being on a budget will help to keep you out of debt. Involve the whole family in helping to improve your financial situation. Encourage older children to get part-time jobs so they can pay for extra things they wish and for spending money. If you look around you will see there are other ways to earn a little extra money through other people's wastefulness. i.e.: collect and return pop and beer cans, etc. Or shop at consignment outlets, look for bargains and use coupons.

5.Make the effort to change things in your life that you are not happy with rather than just complaining about them. i.e.: if you are not happy with your job, look for another one (find one before you quit though); if the relationship in your life is causing you some unhappiness, decide how is the best way to resolve the problem; if you are feeling unhappy in general, only you can do something about it. No one else can make you happy, happiness has to come from within.

On the first day of each new year, open your eyes and say to yourself, 'today is the first day of a better life for myself' and begin by taking charge of your life and instituting changes that will make it better.

What Are The Benefits of Music to Young Children?

Research indicates that early introduction to music helps develop young brains, strengthens listening abilities and assists with problem-solving skills. Singing to a baby from birth can include such old classical rhyming poems such as: Humpty Dumpty, Baa Baa Black Sheep and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. The following are some of the main reasons why introducing music to your young child is important.

- Music provides opportunities to develop social skills. It assists children in being creative. Music can be incorporated into a child's play. This will be advantageous to children because play is really a young child's version of work.
- Singing is verbal play with rhymes and melodies which help children with speech development. Research indicates that music can give children a head start; they are better able to verbalize, are more aware, better able to reason and it increases their cognitive skills.
- The most important brain development takes place in the first six years of their life. Music has been proven to have positive affects on the brain. I have seen this happen with my two year old granddaughter who has had music as a large part of her life since birth. She has been able to carry on a conversation since she was eighteen months old and is able to read such words as gorilla, chimpanzee, giraffe and elephant at an age when most can barely say the words. She also has a fairly good repertoire of songs she can sing on her own.
- Music makes children less inhibited. They enjoy the wonders of sound and are naturally receptive to rhythm and dancing. For this reason, music encourages creativity and interaction in non-threatening ways.
- Motor skills are developed also with the use of musical instruments and dancing to a beat. Involvement with music develops the skills of concentration, coordination and encourages self-esteem and confidence. As a further benefit, music stimulates the senses. At an age where the brain is developing so quickly, this will help the child not only now but as he/she furthers their education and emotional and social development.
- Music of any kind further aides emotional well-being and calms and focuses the mind. Even as an adult I have found this to be true.

What better time to start than now when there are so many Christmas songs that children enjoy while they focus on the exciting day ahead. Most children enjoy songs such as: Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, Jingle Bells and Here Comes Santa Claus. They are fun, lively and can be interactive. But there are many other fun and interactive songs that children also enjoy such as: The Wheels On The Bus, The Eensy Weensy Spider, Old MacDonald Had a Farm, The Farmer in the Dell and Whistle While you Work, to name but a few. So take the time to enjoy singing and dancing with your young child.

The Meaning of Christmas - How We Can Help Others

What Christmas means to us will depend on many things. For the more fortunate of us, it will mean something very different than for those who are going through a difficult time. How do we share our good fortune in order to give Christmas more meaning?

Christmas for many is a feeling of joy; a feeling of warmth and love and time spent together with family and friends. It is a feeling of wanting to share, of giving and thinking of others who are not as fortunate. And for others it is about decorating, baking Christmas goodies, and getting stressed and overly anxious. For many also it is a time to celebrate their religion.

For children it is often about the presents and what they are going to get and the excitement of Santa coming. It may also be about the fun things there are to do during this time of the year - seeing light displays, visiting Santa, making gingerbread houses and the Christmas concert at school.

For those who are not so fortunate, ones without families or perhaps with only a few friends, with little or no money, or for someone whose family lives far away or who has recently become widowed or divorced, it will mean loneliness, unhappiness and another difficult time to get through. If we are one of the fortunate ones, the following are some ideas of how we can reach out and help someone else during the Christmas season:

- We can invite someone to share Christmas Day with us who would otherwise be alone;
- We can give a hamper to help a family through the season;
- We can give gifts to their children;
- We can take someone who has few friends or no family out for lunch;
- We can make an effort to phone a lonely person several times during the Christmas season to let them know that someone is thinking about them;
- We can encourage others to share and hold out their hand in friendship to someone who would otherwise be lonely at this time of the year;
- We can include them in things we may be doing, i.e.: invite them along to go tobogganing or to play in the snow with our children; invite them over for tea and if they have children, for a play date with our children;
- We can look outside of ourselves and our own families to see what we can do for others less fortunate during this holiday season when being alone feels more lonely than at any other time of the year.

If we do something for someone else, even if it is only one thing, it will enhance our own Christmas and our feelings about what the season is all about.

Young Children - The Benefits of Doing Educational Activities With Children at an Early Age

One-on-one time spent doing educational activities with young children helps to develop their brains from as early as newborn and on. According to studies, it not only increases their verbal skills but enhances their early abilities towards reading and other accomplishments.

Beginning to do educational activities with newborns is not too early. Talking to your baby will help them to learn the spoken language; not only to be able to understand, but also to increase their ability to verbalize.

Early introduction to music is important also because babies are sensitive to the sound of music. Even hearing music before their birth will have a calming effect on them. As adults music lifts our moods and will make us smile or cry with emotion; the same is true for young children. My son and daughter-in-law played music before their baby was born. And as a newborn, they sang songs to her and played calming music for naps and night time. When she was about seventeen months old, she loved Silent Night and although she cried emotionally each time she heard it, she wanted to hear it over and over again. Now at just over two years, she spends a lot of time singing and sometimes plays her flute while she dances to music. Because of this early introduction, it seems that music is playing a large part in her life.

The brain builds itself by forcing connections through learning. Babies love to learn and are little sponges in their first few years of life. There are videos available for babies that show the alphabet and numbers and then eases them into the introduction of words. My son and daughter-in-law began using them on a daily basis when their daughter was six months old and are strong advocates of their use. Now at twenty-eight months she is able to read many of her own books herself. Although she enjoys imaginary playtime and the usual things young children play, (i.e.: playing with her dolls, having tea parties, playing at the park and visiting with her cousins, etc.), she always gravitates to her educational games.

As babies grow, there are many educational activities for as early as 12 months or sooner which include books and games about shapes, colours, matching sequences, building blocks, large lego pieces and counting games. Activities such as these are enjoyable for young children when mom and dad are spending time with them. Of my seven grandchildren, she is the only one whose parents have implemented this type of early learning and I can definitely see the advantages of it to her.

Although beginning early reading with a very young child is considered controversial by some, education is becoming more and more important in the world of today. This is evidenced by the all-day kindergarten classes now being held in many areas. I believe that for those who do begin early educational activities, they are giving their children a definite advantage over those who are just beginning to learn their alphabet and numbers in kindergarten.

Aging Parents - How To Handle Their Fears

As people reach their elder years, they become more vulnerable as their feelings of confidence and the ability to care for themselves becomes less. Many elderly are unable to verbalize their fears. As their children and relatives it is up to us to determine what these fears are so we can help them.

My mother, at ninety years old, has many fears and each time she is hospitalized, they are like demons staring her in the face. Her first fear, and justifiably so after being hospitalized following a fall, was losing her independence. Combined with a very serious bladder infection, the result was that she was unable to drive again. This is a huge adjustment for a senior, especially one who had until then been very active.

Another fear, and again justifiable, was losing her dignity as she felt happened when she was ill in the hospital and unable to do many of the required things for herself. Being forced to be more reliant on others she felt was an extreme affront. This is very difficult for someone who has always relied on themselves and been very independent until her 87th year.

For her, fear of another fall became huge also because although she was fortunate not to have broken any bones, she was extremely afraid of a broken hip. And as most seniors further lose their independence, they fear isolation and loneliness as well. They see their friends dying around them and may wonder what is the use of living. Others may begin to fear dying themselves. As my mother said recently, she has too many things she wants to do yet. Many also fear becoming a burden on their families.

My mother fears having a stroke and being paralyzed. She said she would rather die with a massive heart attack. And since she has recently seen a friend die with cancer, she now has a fear of getting a recurrence of her cancer.

As seniors' brains begin to work more slowly and their memory isn't what it used to be, the fear of getting dimentia or Alzheimers is high. My mother, like many seniors, rails against being hard of hearing but she fears losing her eyesight even more since she is an avid reader.

Many others have financial fears and concerns as to their futures and others, when it is necessary to go into an assisted living type of situation, fear giving up their possessions. There are many in this generation, because of growing up in the Great Depression, have been hoarders and value their many possessions, not wishing to give any of them up even if they have no idea what they've got stashed away. And others fear losing their rights and the ability to make their own decisions.

Knowing and understanding the fears our parents or grandparents have, it is up to us as adult children to help them through this difficult time. The following are some ideas which may be helpful in assisting them:

- respect how your aging parents feel - validate their feelings;
- be understanding of their fears and give your support and love;
- listen to what your parent is really saying – keep the lines of communication open;
- help in any way possible to find solutions to their fears, i.e.: get a raised toilet seat to make getting on and off the toilet easier, get a bed rail to assist them in getting out of bed, look into daily help or if necessary, assisted living if more help is required, take them for regular doctor's appointments, make sure that they are not isolated, ensure that their diets are nutritional and that medications are taken as required;
- since falling is a serious fear, if your parent is unsteady on his/her feet, look into the need or possibility of a walker, make sure they are wearing stable shoes and hip protectors, and remove throw rugs and any other obstacles which may trip them.

My mother lives in an assisted living facility and her fears are no different than most of the other residents who also live there.

If we understand that most of these fears are valid, it is easier to assist our elderly parents. As adult children to our aging parents, I believe it is important to do what we can to make their remaining years as comfortable as possible.

Memory Loss and the Elderly

Memory loss in the elderly was once considered inevitable especially after the age of seventy. Studies now show that it can be slowed down and even improved upon.

Some of the initial signs of these memory losses are:

- forgetting a person's name;
- forgetting the right word to use;
- forgetting where they put something, i.e.: their house keys;
- asking the same question over and over again;
- telling the same story over and over again;
- being confused with times and places;
- driving difficulties and getting lost in familiar places.

Gradual memory loss will not interfere with everyday activities. More serious memory loss that has an underlying basis in disease or depression, etc. is more than just forgetting things; it causes problems with thinking, reasoning, communicating and emotions. These include things like forgetting how to do something they once knew how to do. If this type of memory loss is suspected, it is wise to consult your family doctor.

Mild cognitive impairment (memory loss) appears, according to studies, to be slightly higher in men than in women. It's thought that men may begin to experience symptoms earlier but more gradually than women but with women, once memory loss begins, it will be more rapid.

Memory loss depends to a large extent on the physical health, lifestyle and educational level of the senior. Distractions, fatigue, poor concentration, emotional problems, lack of confidence and negativity can all add to seniors' problems with memory. Some over-the-counter drug combinations can also cause difficulties as can the excessive use of alcohol or drugs.

By exercising the brain and practicing memory skills, memory loss can easily be maintained. The popular saying to use it or lose it, is a good rule to follow.

Some of the ways of avoiding the risk of memory loss that will affect normal everyday life are to avoid smoking, to control high blood pressure, to eat a balanced diet and to lead an active lifestyle. It is especially important to keep the mind stimulated and busy. There are vitamins and minerals that the elderly can take to help slow the progress of memory loss as well. They are in the Vitamin B group of vitamins as well as iron, zinc and Omega 3. It is also important to avoid distractions, to focus and to listen closely. Maintaining social relationships will help greatly in slowing memory loss in the elderly too.

However, in some cases what may appear to be memory loss may not be entirely that but rather a general slowing down of the thinking process as people reach their elder years of mid-sixties and beyond. But no one can go wrong by following the suggestions of maintaining their current levels as mentioned above.

How to Have Fun While Keeping Expenses on a Tight Leash

For many who live on limited incomes, having fun often doesn't seem possible; life is a grind just to make ends meet sometimes. But it can be done by checking your community calendar, watching your local newspaper or researching online for ideas on free or economical things to do.

When weather permits there are many ways to enjoy the outdoors with no cost or at minimal expense. The following are some ideas:

- there are many places to go for walks and for the more adventurous, most communities have areas with hiking trails;
- go to a local lake or the ocean for a day of swimming, building sandcastles or flying a kite;
- go to a marina and watch sailboats race;
- go kayaking or canoeing;
- take a picnic to your local park, have a game of frisbee, throw a ball around or collect colorful fall leaves;
- explore your neighborhood and go biking at the same time;
- become a photographer and take pictures wherever you go;
- spend an afternoon picking strawberries, blueberries or blackberries and then go home and make jam or a pie;
- play badminton, bocci ball or croquet;
- go camping by a creek and fish for trout;
- get friends together and have a game of baseball or soccer;
- in the winter go to the mountains and toboggan;
- build a snowman, a fort or have a snowball fight;
- if you're fortunate enough to have lakes that freeze in the winter, go ice skating;
- at Christmas time, go on a tree hunting expedition and cut your own;
- go to the pumpkin patch or the corn maze in the fall;
- take the children to the petting zoo;
- go to a bird sanctuary when many of them are wintering;
- go for a walk and enjoy a sunset.

When the weather isn't quite so nice, there are still many things that can be done that are reasonably priced or free. The following are some:

- spend an afternoon visiting the library;
- get friends or family together for board games, cards or charades;
- have potluck parties with friends;
- browse through a bookstore or spend a pleasant afternoon reading;
- go to garage sales, flea markets or a craft fair;
- start a challenging puzzle;
- get friends and family together for an evening of watching videos or DVD's;
- start a new hobby;
- learn a new skill;
- look for free or economical exhibits, events or entertainment;
- look for coupons and use them;
- during holidays there are always attractions such as a visit to Santa, various parades, looking at Christmas light exhibits and the many other festivities there are at this time of the year;
- paint and decorate eggs at Easter time;
- do a craft project with your children.

If you know where to look and are open to suggestions and new ideas, there will always be something fun to do that will fit into even the tightest budget.