Many of your decisions will depend upon how much money you have allocated towards a new house, what area you want to live in, whether you are a first time buyer or are downsizing, have children, need to be near an elementary school, the freeway, your job, transportation, or want a yard or no yard.
House buying is not a decision to be made lightly. It is one of the most expensive outlays you will ever make. And where you live can have a huge impact on other aspects of your life as well. If you spend more than you can comfortably afford, you will constantly be broke and won't be able to afford other things you may want to do. If you have children, you will want to be near schools otherwise getting them to and from school will become an onerous task. Having to drive an hour or more to and from work will lose its appeal even if you love the acre you're on - you won't have time to keep it up. So, as we've always heard, location is a very important component to consider when buying a new home.
Other important things to consider are whether the inside layout of the house is functional for your family. Where are the extra bedrooms in relationship to the master bedroom? This may be important if there are small children. Is there a bathroom on each floor? The accessibility of bathrooms is important with young children especially. Where is the laundry? The kitchen will be important to most women and especially if entertaining is an important aspect of your lifestyle.
Many of the newer homes have the combination kitchen/living room called a great room. But this may not work, depending on the size it is, if the family is large or if there are large groups entertained. A formal dining room may also be something that is considered important.
When looking at houses it is very easy to be swayed by a nicely 'dressed' home. One couple I know bought a house because they fell in love with the beautiful garden. It wasn't until the following year when they realized that the lovely flowers had been annuals and would have to be planted again in order to get their beautiful garden back. Unfortunately, they were not dedicated gardeners. Another couple bought a home they were impressed with and didn't realize that what they had admired was the lovely art work on the walls but the kitchen, which had originally been their number one priority, was sadly lacking. And still another couple became entranced with the idea of a ravine in their back yard with nature as their neighbor until they had raccoons in their attic, raccoons under their solarium and the same little beasts destroying their pond.
The safest thing to do when heading out on a house hunting expeditions is to take a list of things that are 'the' most important such as affordability of home, number of bedrooms, location, etc., and a good realtor.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Collections and Antiques - What Are They Worth?
Collections can have an emotional, historic or personal value and sometimes a monetary value as well. Antiques will have a monetary and historic value but will sometimes have an emotional or personal value too.
Collections usually begin because of a personal interest in them. They can be anything: birthday cards, postcards, comics, baseball or hockey cards, specific CD's, old records, unique maps, Nancy Drew books, old coins, cow or owl ornaments, souvenirs, bells, tourist pennants, event pins, fridge magnets or stamps. Some of these items will have a monetary value in time such as a comic book collection, baseball or hockey cards, event pins or stamps. Old records may also but when trying to ascertain a monetary value for a 1920's collection of His Master's Voice red and black label records of my mother's, I was unable to find a value for them. Her stamp collection also would require some extensive research. Neither of these items have any emotional or personal value to her; their only value now being monetary.
Some collections such as unique or historical swords, Depress glass or special dolls can have a historic and monetary value as well as perhaps emotional and personal value. My daughter-in-law collects Depression glass initially because she inherited some pieces from her grandmother. Those particular pieces have an emotional value to her. The pieces she has added to her collection have a personal interest value to her although they do have a monetary value as well. My doll collection began in the same way. Given a lovely Ashton Drake doll as a gift, I have since added to my slowly growing collection. Although they have a monetary value, to me the value is mainly personal interest. Antique fishing lures can be considered to be a collection but will have a historic and monetry value and probably personal value as well.
Antiques may be collected because of our enjoyment of them, as an investment, a personal interest or they may have just happened as in the case of inheritances. Some say that antiques are something that is fifty years or older while others say they must be one hundred years or older.
Many of my antiques have an emotional value to me and I would never sell them. I have a Singer Sewing Machine that my grandmother brought to Canada in 1910 as well as a dinner set and a tea set that she brought over at the same time. But I also have a beautiful late 1800's antique pump organ which I purchased that has no emotional value to me. Because I no longer have room for it, I am selling it but am having difficulty discovering what its monetary value is.
Antiques, like collections have an emotional and personal interest that can be worth a lot to us. But if we are more concerned with their monetary value, they appear to be as valuable as what someone is willing to pay for them. Like anything else, their monetary value will depend upon the demand for them.
Collections usually begin because of a personal interest in them. They can be anything: birthday cards, postcards, comics, baseball or hockey cards, specific CD's, old records, unique maps, Nancy Drew books, old coins, cow or owl ornaments, souvenirs, bells, tourist pennants, event pins, fridge magnets or stamps. Some of these items will have a monetary value in time such as a comic book collection, baseball or hockey cards, event pins or stamps. Old records may also but when trying to ascertain a monetary value for a 1920's collection of His Master's Voice red and black label records of my mother's, I was unable to find a value for them. Her stamp collection also would require some extensive research. Neither of these items have any emotional or personal value to her; their only value now being monetary.
Some collections such as unique or historical swords, Depress glass or special dolls can have a historic and monetary value as well as perhaps emotional and personal value. My daughter-in-law collects Depression glass initially because she inherited some pieces from her grandmother. Those particular pieces have an emotional value to her. The pieces she has added to her collection have a personal interest value to her although they do have a monetary value as well. My doll collection began in the same way. Given a lovely Ashton Drake doll as a gift, I have since added to my slowly growing collection. Although they have a monetary value, to me the value is mainly personal interest. Antique fishing lures can be considered to be a collection but will have a historic and monetry value and probably personal value as well.
Antiques may be collected because of our enjoyment of them, as an investment, a personal interest or they may have just happened as in the case of inheritances. Some say that antiques are something that is fifty years or older while others say they must be one hundred years or older.
Many of my antiques have an emotional value to me and I would never sell them. I have a Singer Sewing Machine that my grandmother brought to Canada in 1910 as well as a dinner set and a tea set that she brought over at the same time. But I also have a beautiful late 1800's antique pump organ which I purchased that has no emotional value to me. Because I no longer have room for it, I am selling it but am having difficulty discovering what its monetary value is.
Antiques, like collections have an emotional and personal interest that can be worth a lot to us. But if we are more concerned with their monetary value, they appear to be as valuable as what someone is willing to pay for them. Like anything else, their monetary value will depend upon the demand for them.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Can We Trust Our Memories?
Are our memories always accurate? If you ask your sister or brother about an incident in your lives as children would they remember it as you have? It is quite likely that their memory will be quite different from yours Why is this?
We all have memories; good and bad, old and new, accurate and otherwise. For seniors, unable to be active either because of health problems or lack of desire, their memories are very much a part of the person they are. It is their entertainment while they remember past experiences and it is part of the stories they tell. But are these stories true? Memories for children also have an important place in their lives. Their memories, in part, form the basis of their characters and personalities. For all of us, memories are important. But if they are not accurate, how can they play such an important part in our lives?
Some of us remember things with humour, even if the original happening was not funny; others remember a story more negatively or positively than others. Often, another person will have no memory of a situation because to them it was not as important as you had felt it to be. What we remember and how we remember can tell a lot about who we are.
When I write a story about my childhood memories, my brothers will often accuse me of making it up. Although my two brothers and I are within three years, we often remember our childhood in very different ways. I find this difficult to understand when we are so similar in ages.
One such memory was from when I was eleven years old. I organized and put on a carnival in our yard for the neighbours. My plan was to earn money for materials so my grandfather could build me a playhouse. This is a very prominent memory for me. I recently discovered that my older brother had no recollection of it at all although my younger brother did remember that his old toys went into the fishing game. Because the carnival was important to me I remembered it vividly; my younger brother had a vested interest because his old toys were used, so he remembers it also; but my older brother had no particular involvement so he had no personal memory of it at all. To him it had no significance in his life and therefore there was no memory of it. And my mother remembered it because she had a lot of work to do with my great idea.
Another episode happened at a recent get together. My younger brother claimed that our father used to hit him. My older brother and I were aghast; our father never hit any of us at any time. Our brother insisted and it was evident he sincerely believed his story or he'd never have mentioned it to us. I repeated the conversation to my mother. "Are you sure he wasn't talking about me?" she asked. She was correct with her memories because my older brother and I both remember our mother becoming very angry with the younger brother at times and occasionally giving him a swat or two. The younger brother's memory is completely contradictory to my brother, mother and I. Why does he have this completely erroneous memory, we wondered? And when did he start to build it? My older brother thinks he may have this 'memory' as justification for not visiting our father when he was dying in the hospital and now believes his own story. We will never know. But we do know our father never hit him.
The three of us, four including our mother, have quite different memories of our grandfather also; and each memory portrays him in quite a different way. I believe that each of our personalities have a bearing also on how we view different sitiations. As a result, this will no doubt affect how we will remember things that happen to us.
So when family stories are passed down from one generation to another, can we believe them to be true memories? Or are they just stories that will change through the generations? Whatever they are, memories are an important part of the person we are whether they are accurate or not because we each believe in the accuracy of our own memories.
We all have memories; good and bad, old and new, accurate and otherwise. For seniors, unable to be active either because of health problems or lack of desire, their memories are very much a part of the person they are. It is their entertainment while they remember past experiences and it is part of the stories they tell. But are these stories true? Memories for children also have an important place in their lives. Their memories, in part, form the basis of their characters and personalities. For all of us, memories are important. But if they are not accurate, how can they play such an important part in our lives?
Some of us remember things with humour, even if the original happening was not funny; others remember a story more negatively or positively than others. Often, another person will have no memory of a situation because to them it was not as important as you had felt it to be. What we remember and how we remember can tell a lot about who we are.
When I write a story about my childhood memories, my brothers will often accuse me of making it up. Although my two brothers and I are within three years, we often remember our childhood in very different ways. I find this difficult to understand when we are so similar in ages.
One such memory was from when I was eleven years old. I organized and put on a carnival in our yard for the neighbours. My plan was to earn money for materials so my grandfather could build me a playhouse. This is a very prominent memory for me. I recently discovered that my older brother had no recollection of it at all although my younger brother did remember that his old toys went into the fishing game. Because the carnival was important to me I remembered it vividly; my younger brother had a vested interest because his old toys were used, so he remembers it also; but my older brother had no particular involvement so he had no personal memory of it at all. To him it had no significance in his life and therefore there was no memory of it. And my mother remembered it because she had a lot of work to do with my great idea.
Another episode happened at a recent get together. My younger brother claimed that our father used to hit him. My older brother and I were aghast; our father never hit any of us at any time. Our brother insisted and it was evident he sincerely believed his story or he'd never have mentioned it to us. I repeated the conversation to my mother. "Are you sure he wasn't talking about me?" she asked. She was correct with her memories because my older brother and I both remember our mother becoming very angry with the younger brother at times and occasionally giving him a swat or two. The younger brother's memory is completely contradictory to my brother, mother and I. Why does he have this completely erroneous memory, we wondered? And when did he start to build it? My older brother thinks he may have this 'memory' as justification for not visiting our father when he was dying in the hospital and now believes his own story. We will never know. But we do know our father never hit him.
The three of us, four including our mother, have quite different memories of our grandfather also; and each memory portrays him in quite a different way. I believe that each of our personalities have a bearing also on how we view different sitiations. As a result, this will no doubt affect how we will remember things that happen to us.
So when family stories are passed down from one generation to another, can we believe them to be true memories? Or are they just stories that will change through the generations? Whatever they are, memories are an important part of the person we are whether they are accurate or not because we each believe in the accuracy of our own memories.
Monday, January 4, 2010
The Time Capsule - A New Decade
What better time is there to start a new tradition; one that will bring together memories and the importance of family? A time capsule is something that will draw a family together whether it is opened in one year, ten years or twenty years.
In 2000, which was not only the beginning of a new year, a new decade but a new century, I started my time capsule by writing each of my children a letter and those grandchildren who had already made their appearance in our family. My mother also wrote letters to each of the family members. These will be particularly special because she is now 89 years old. At the beginning of another new year and decade, I am writing a second letter to each of my children and grandchildchildren which will now include the newest members of our fast-growing family.
Included also will be the annual Christmas letters that have been sent to friends over most of the past ten years. These letters tell much of what happens each year within the family. I will also include the annual family newsletter and current pictures of each family member. Over the year we also have many family occasions which include birthday celebrations, births, baby showers, graduations, our Christmas Eve celebration and Christmas Day. As well, we will add special personal items that are significant to each family member such as any business cards or announcements, etc. Included also would be the recipe for the Rolladen dish we have every Christmas Eve. Other family members have their own special dishes that are brought to family occasions and those recipes could be included also. Miscellaneous items that could also be included are possibly a sports day ribbon, report cards or whatever else that will tell a story of the family when the capsule is opened. Family members can contribute their own letters or whatever else they want to add to the time capsule as well.
A time capsule can be done not only for a family group, but special friends, a class of school children, grandparents for their grandchildren or to be put away for future generations to be opened twenty, thirty or fifty years in the future.
It is recommended that time capsules not be buried because of their exposure to the elements and the possibility of them being lost or forgotten. The contents of my time capsule have been placed in a large tin box which is kept on a shelf in one of my closets. There is a note attached to the outside explaining what it is and the proposed date for looking at the contents. We have decided on the new year of 2020.
A time capsule is not only something that reinforces the meaning of family or friend groups but is a fun project to do as well. It gives families a chance to work together on a joint project too.
In 2000, which was not only the beginning of a new year, a new decade but a new century, I started my time capsule by writing each of my children a letter and those grandchildren who had already made their appearance in our family. My mother also wrote letters to each of the family members. These will be particularly special because she is now 89 years old. At the beginning of another new year and decade, I am writing a second letter to each of my children and grandchildchildren which will now include the newest members of our fast-growing family.
Included also will be the annual Christmas letters that have been sent to friends over most of the past ten years. These letters tell much of what happens each year within the family. I will also include the annual family newsletter and current pictures of each family member. Over the year we also have many family occasions which include birthday celebrations, births, baby showers, graduations, our Christmas Eve celebration and Christmas Day. As well, we will add special personal items that are significant to each family member such as any business cards or announcements, etc. Included also would be the recipe for the Rolladen dish we have every Christmas Eve. Other family members have their own special dishes that are brought to family occasions and those recipes could be included also. Miscellaneous items that could also be included are possibly a sports day ribbon, report cards or whatever else that will tell a story of the family when the capsule is opened. Family members can contribute their own letters or whatever else they want to add to the time capsule as well.
A time capsule can be done not only for a family group, but special friends, a class of school children, grandparents for their grandchildren or to be put away for future generations to be opened twenty, thirty or fifty years in the future.
It is recommended that time capsules not be buried because of their exposure to the elements and the possibility of them being lost or forgotten. The contents of my time capsule have been placed in a large tin box which is kept on a shelf in one of my closets. There is a note attached to the outside explaining what it is and the proposed date for looking at the contents. We have decided on the new year of 2020.
A time capsule is not only something that reinforces the meaning of family or friend groups but is a fun project to do as well. It gives families a chance to work together on a joint project too.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Christmas at its Best
Many people who did not have good Christmas season experiences as children have carried these feelings over into adulthood. But for many young children, the lead up to Christmas can be a very exciting and magical time as they imagine Santa working with his elves before making his long trip to deliver gifts around the world. How can we make the Christmas season a happy occasion for all of our children?
As parents, our attitudes will determine the success of the Christmas season for our offspring. The most important rule in my opinion is to keep it simple. Many of the things that we have on our lists don’t really have to be done in order for Christmas to be successful. The following are some ideas to simplify the Christmas season:
- Try sending e-cards to friends and family instead of mailing out regular Christmas
cards. This not only saves time but money as well because there will be no need
to purchase either cards or postage.
- Shop early. By beginning to shop for the next Christmas at the Boxing Day sales will
eliminate the last minute shopping frenzy. It also spreads the expense of Christmas gift
buying over the entire year.
- Bake ahead and freeze the treats so there is no last minute rush to get all the baking done.
- And try to remain calm and relatively stress-free so that you may enjoy the Christmas
season with your children.
Christmas is for children. There are many things we can do with our children to make their memories of Christmases past good ones; filled with the many things they enjoyed that they’ll want to pass along to their own children. The following are some ideas of things we can do:
- Help them write a letter to Santa and ensure that they receive an answer.
- Let your children help you decorate the Christmas tree. Our trees don’t have to be show
home creations designed to impress our neighbors and friends – Christmas is for families.
- Let the children help to make and decorate some special Christmas cookies; most love to mix
and break eggs. A little mess is not a big problem when compared with the enjoyment
children get from being able to help. This year we made eggnog cookies decorated with
candies.
- Have an advent calendar.
- Take your child to a homeless shelter so they are able to get a better perspective on
Christmas. Have him/her bring a cash donation/food/or something warm to leave for a
homeless person.
- Let your child be part of the whole Christmas experience including helping to buy gifts for a
special aunt or uncle. I took my six year old grandson along with me to buy a few things and
purchased a couple of the items that he suggested. (I hope he was right).
As parents I think we should remember that children don’t need a lot of gifts. They will become overwhelmed and desensitized with the amount; especially if they are also receiving gifts from aunts and uncles and other extended family members. One or two special gifts will be sufficient in making children happy. And for young children especially, gifts do not need to be expensive. Also, children really don’t expect to get everything they ask for on their list.
If we want our children to look back on the Christmases of their childhood with fond memories, it will be up to us as parents, and grandparents, to make those memories as happy as possible. I think the bottom line is that if we remain calm and stress-free, so shall our children be. I wish you all a very Merry Christmas.
As parents, our attitudes will determine the success of the Christmas season for our offspring. The most important rule in my opinion is to keep it simple. Many of the things that we have on our lists don’t really have to be done in order for Christmas to be successful. The following are some ideas to simplify the Christmas season:
- Try sending e-cards to friends and family instead of mailing out regular Christmas
cards. This not only saves time but money as well because there will be no need
to purchase either cards or postage.
- Shop early. By beginning to shop for the next Christmas at the Boxing Day sales will
eliminate the last minute shopping frenzy. It also spreads the expense of Christmas gift
buying over the entire year.
- Bake ahead and freeze the treats so there is no last minute rush to get all the baking done.
- And try to remain calm and relatively stress-free so that you may enjoy the Christmas
season with your children.
Christmas is for children. There are many things we can do with our children to make their memories of Christmases past good ones; filled with the many things they enjoyed that they’ll want to pass along to their own children. The following are some ideas of things we can do:
- Help them write a letter to Santa and ensure that they receive an answer.
- Let your children help you decorate the Christmas tree. Our trees don’t have to be show
home creations designed to impress our neighbors and friends – Christmas is for families.
- Let the children help to make and decorate some special Christmas cookies; most love to mix
and break eggs. A little mess is not a big problem when compared with the enjoyment
children get from being able to help. This year we made eggnog cookies decorated with
candies.
- Have an advent calendar.
- Take your child to a homeless shelter so they are able to get a better perspective on
Christmas. Have him/her bring a cash donation/food/or something warm to leave for a
homeless person.
- Let your child be part of the whole Christmas experience including helping to buy gifts for a
special aunt or uncle. I took my six year old grandson along with me to buy a few things and
purchased a couple of the items that he suggested. (I hope he was right).
As parents I think we should remember that children don’t need a lot of gifts. They will become overwhelmed and desensitized with the amount; especially if they are also receiving gifts from aunts and uncles and other extended family members. One or two special gifts will be sufficient in making children happy. And for young children especially, gifts do not need to be expensive. Also, children really don’t expect to get everything they ask for on their list.
If we want our children to look back on the Christmases of their childhood with fond memories, it will be up to us as parents, and grandparents, to make those memories as happy as possible. I think the bottom line is that if we remain calm and stress-free, so shall our children be. I wish you all a very Merry Christmas.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Family Traditions at Christmas Time
Traditions are the glue that sticks families together. Many traditions are passed down from one generation to another but a new one can be started at any time. In our family we have many that have been passed down although they may have been altered somewhat over the years. My family, like many families, is very serious about its traditions.
Christmas Eve is the day our family gets together for our special holiday season dinner. The menu never changes because that is one of our very important Christmas traditions. The ‘absolutely-do-not-ever-change’ items are Rolladen, pickled red cabbage, cooked garlic sausage, potato salad, brussell sprouts, pickled beets and pickled herring. I can add other items, and do, without too much harassment. And although many of our family dinners are now buffet-style, our Christmas Eve dinner is always a sit-down one even though we now number twenty-four.
After dinner and everything has been cleared away, it is gift opening time. A volunteer Santa gives out the gifts to the children first before the adults open their gifts. Because our family has grown so large, it now takes us over two hours to open all of the gifts. While we open our presents, we play Christmas music in the background.
Before Christmas we have traditions that are child oriented. They are ones that I did with my own children and which I now continue to do with my grandchildren. My parents did a few of them with my brothers and me. Some of them are:
- the children decorate gingerbread houses, gingerbread trains and gingerbread men;
- they help to make cookie dough and then decorate the cookies before baking;
- we do various Christmas crafts – i.e.: decorate snowmen and snowflakes, etc.;
- the children help to decorate the tree with gobs of tinsel hung on each branch;
- we go to see the annual Santa Claus parade;
- they write a letter to Santa;
- we visit Santa at the Mall;
- go Christmas caroling in the neighborhood;
- drive around and look at Christmas lights;
- and go to advertised local Christmas activities.
Because these traditions have been part of my children’s and grandchildren’s lives from very early ages, they will in all likelihood continue many of them with their own families. I have seen it with my own children. Last year on Christmas Eve day we had an unusually heavy snowfall. I worried about my family driving in terrible conditions and suggested that we postpone our Christmas Eve celebrations until the roads were better. None of my five children agreed with me. They all insisted that we can’t postpone our Christmas Eve celebrations. Thankfully everyone arrived safely and as expected, we all had a wonderful time.
Another holiday season tradition is our New Year’s Day dinner out at a restaurant. It is relatively new to our family as we have only been doing it for about ten years. It is practical in that after all the festivities of the Christmas season and New Year’s Eve celebrations no one is particularly anxious to host a New Year’s Day dinner as well.
This year I have written our first annual family newsletter which I hope will become another family tradition. (It will be an end-of-the-year newsletter) I interviewed each of the grandchildren and put what they wanted to say into the newsletter as near as possible to their own way of speaking and added their pictures and bylines. For the babies I wrote up something for them and added their pictures and bylines also. I then did a review of the whole year with family pictures of various functions which were held throughout the year.
On New Years day of 2000, I wrote a letter to each of my five children and the two grandchildren I had at that time and placed them into a tin box. On New Years day of 2010, I will write another letter to each of my children and grandchildren and will add letters to the new grandchildren to put into the box. And on New Years day of 2020, we plan to open it up and read all the letters, perhaps at our annual New Years dinner out.
I believe a family that has traditions which are important to each of them will tend to be a closer unit. Traditions seem to be the glue that sticks us together.
Christmas Eve is the day our family gets together for our special holiday season dinner. The menu never changes because that is one of our very important Christmas traditions. The ‘absolutely-do-not-ever-change’ items are Rolladen, pickled red cabbage, cooked garlic sausage, potato salad, brussell sprouts, pickled beets and pickled herring. I can add other items, and do, without too much harassment. And although many of our family dinners are now buffet-style, our Christmas Eve dinner is always a sit-down one even though we now number twenty-four.
After dinner and everything has been cleared away, it is gift opening time. A volunteer Santa gives out the gifts to the children first before the adults open their gifts. Because our family has grown so large, it now takes us over two hours to open all of the gifts. While we open our presents, we play Christmas music in the background.
Before Christmas we have traditions that are child oriented. They are ones that I did with my own children and which I now continue to do with my grandchildren. My parents did a few of them with my brothers and me. Some of them are:
- the children decorate gingerbread houses, gingerbread trains and gingerbread men;
- they help to make cookie dough and then decorate the cookies before baking;
- we do various Christmas crafts – i.e.: decorate snowmen and snowflakes, etc.;
- the children help to decorate the tree with gobs of tinsel hung on each branch;
- we go to see the annual Santa Claus parade;
- they write a letter to Santa;
- we visit Santa at the Mall;
- go Christmas caroling in the neighborhood;
- drive around and look at Christmas lights;
- and go to advertised local Christmas activities.
Because these traditions have been part of my children’s and grandchildren’s lives from very early ages, they will in all likelihood continue many of them with their own families. I have seen it with my own children. Last year on Christmas Eve day we had an unusually heavy snowfall. I worried about my family driving in terrible conditions and suggested that we postpone our Christmas Eve celebrations until the roads were better. None of my five children agreed with me. They all insisted that we can’t postpone our Christmas Eve celebrations. Thankfully everyone arrived safely and as expected, we all had a wonderful time.
Another holiday season tradition is our New Year’s Day dinner out at a restaurant. It is relatively new to our family as we have only been doing it for about ten years. It is practical in that after all the festivities of the Christmas season and New Year’s Eve celebrations no one is particularly anxious to host a New Year’s Day dinner as well.
This year I have written our first annual family newsletter which I hope will become another family tradition. (It will be an end-of-the-year newsletter) I interviewed each of the grandchildren and put what they wanted to say into the newsletter as near as possible to their own way of speaking and added their pictures and bylines. For the babies I wrote up something for them and added their pictures and bylines also. I then did a review of the whole year with family pictures of various functions which were held throughout the year.
On New Years day of 2000, I wrote a letter to each of my five children and the two grandchildren I had at that time and placed them into a tin box. On New Years day of 2010, I will write another letter to each of my children and grandchildren and will add letters to the new grandchildren to put into the box. And on New Years day of 2020, we plan to open it up and read all the letters, perhaps at our annual New Years dinner out.
I believe a family that has traditions which are important to each of them will tend to be a closer unit. Traditions seem to be the glue that sticks us together.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Self-Discipline - Getting Where We Want To Go
The difference between thinking about what we want to do and getting ourselves there requires considerable self-discipline. It will also be necessary to combine this with willpower and self-control. There are many things we can do to establish our skills in this area so that we can succeed at whatever we have decided to do.
The following are some ways to increase our inner strength and determination in order to develop self-discipline:
- decide to lose ten or more pounds and stick to our diet until we have reached our desired weight;
- make a decision to have a more toned body or to develop our muscles and stick to an exercise program until we have achieved our goal;
- decide to quite smoking by the end of three months.
Or we can encourage ourselves to do something that needs to be done but that we don’t want to do or feel uncomfortable doing such as:
- cut the grass regularly every weekend even if we’d rather be playing computer games or something else we enjoy;
- make a personal commitment to take the dog for a walk every day, rain or shine;
- if we are shy, make the decision to initiate a conversation with someone we don’t know every time we go shopping;
- if the breakfast dishes are still in the sink every night when we come home from work, determine to do them before we sit in front of the television. (The job will be much worse to do the following day.)
Other ways of practicing self-discipline are:
- if we love chocolate, we won’t eat any for a week;
- if we want to go to Mexico but can’t afford it, we save all of our loose change and put it into a jar towards our trip instead of going for our special coffee every day;
- we can practice self-discipline when we are self-employed by establishing regular hours and working them even if something more enjoyable comes up;
- we can make ourselves a realistic list of what we wish to achieve each day and
commit ourselves to completing each task on our list
All of these things require self-discipline and the ability to self-regulate. If we cheat, we are only cheating ourselves. When we work towards becoming self-disciplined, it will be necessary to be focused, diligent, persistent and persevering.
Becoming self-disciplined helps us to withstand hardships and to endure difficulties in order to achieve our goals. Once we learn this important trait, we will feel in control of our lives and be much happier and self-contented.
Do you quit things a short time after you’ve started them because you don’t have the willpower or self-discipline to complete the task? If we quit things because we don’t like them, we’ll never become self-disciplined or accomplish our goals.
There is a saying, ‘Quitters never win and winners never quit.’ If we all followed that old adage, we’d all be winners. But by learning to be self-disciplined, we will have chosen the path to success.
The following are some ways to increase our inner strength and determination in order to develop self-discipline:
- decide to lose ten or more pounds and stick to our diet until we have reached our desired weight;
- make a decision to have a more toned body or to develop our muscles and stick to an exercise program until we have achieved our goal;
- decide to quite smoking by the end of three months.
Or we can encourage ourselves to do something that needs to be done but that we don’t want to do or feel uncomfortable doing such as:
- cut the grass regularly every weekend even if we’d rather be playing computer games or something else we enjoy;
- make a personal commitment to take the dog for a walk every day, rain or shine;
- if we are shy, make the decision to initiate a conversation with someone we don’t know every time we go shopping;
- if the breakfast dishes are still in the sink every night when we come home from work, determine to do them before we sit in front of the television. (The job will be much worse to do the following day.)
Other ways of practicing self-discipline are:
- if we love chocolate, we won’t eat any for a week;
- if we want to go to Mexico but can’t afford it, we save all of our loose change and put it into a jar towards our trip instead of going for our special coffee every day;
- we can practice self-discipline when we are self-employed by establishing regular hours and working them even if something more enjoyable comes up;
- we can make ourselves a realistic list of what we wish to achieve each day and
commit ourselves to completing each task on our list
All of these things require self-discipline and the ability to self-regulate. If we cheat, we are only cheating ourselves. When we work towards becoming self-disciplined, it will be necessary to be focused, diligent, persistent and persevering.
Becoming self-disciplined helps us to withstand hardships and to endure difficulties in order to achieve our goals. Once we learn this important trait, we will feel in control of our lives and be much happier and self-contented.
Do you quit things a short time after you’ve started them because you don’t have the willpower or self-discipline to complete the task? If we quit things because we don’t like them, we’ll never become self-disciplined or accomplish our goals.
There is a saying, ‘Quitters never win and winners never quit.’ If we all followed that old adage, we’d all be winners. But by learning to be self-disciplined, we will have chosen the path to success.
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